5 Ways To Conquer 'I Can't Declutter': Overcome Limited Beliefs Around Clutter

Tried and failed to achieve lasting order within your home? Practiced the experts' decluttering tips yet are still stuck in a room telling yourself.

"Let's face it, I can't declutter."

It may be your limiting beliefs around clutter- time for an alternative approach.

Last year, I released a video on 20 lies about clutter we tell ourselves that prevent us from transforming our space. (I recommend you watch it, as it covers much of what we'll discuss!)

One thing that has always fascinated me about the human mind is how intricately it tries to protect itself.

This is especially true for our core beliefs, which often include limiting beliefs- a barrier to protection.

Limiting beliefs (which include beliefs such as "I can't declutter") often manifest as a wall of fear attempting to protect us, but ironically, this barrier keeps us from making progress.

Clutter can catalyze people to take their first steps toward overcoming these limiting thoughts.

The number one cause of chaotic spaces is the core beliefs you carry about:

• Your belongings
• Your environment
• What you think you deserve
• What do you feel capable of

In fact, this is typically the only difference between a person who can maintain a clutter-free space and one who says, "I can't declutter"- the beliefs they carry.

The notion that "natural traits" are more influential is a common limiting belief among those who struggle with their environments.

Clutter is one of the most common stressors to plague any person's space, regardless of personality type.

I believe everyone can create a "holistic haven" and reclaim their physical environment!

After years of helping students do just that- whether they are super organized or more creative types–

I'm convinced it can be done by ANYONE who puts in time and effort- no more "I can't declutter"! 😉

The number one barrier every single time is limiting beliefs around clutter- usually as fear around letting go.

If you want to learn more about this, read 'This is why you have so much clutter.'

It's important to know how these limiting beliefs work so you can work through them and truly transform your space.

The "why I can't declutter": your subconscious

Our beliefs are the navigational tools of our life. They sit deep in our subconscious, forming a massive database that guides us through experiences and establishes how we perceive the world.

This impressive network ultimately defines who each of us is as individuals- It's where the belief of "I can't declutter" stems from.

It's astonishing how our beliefs can hold us back- and yet, if we're willing to challenge them by considering additional evidence, the result is limitless.

Dr. Carol Dweck introduced a "growth mindset" as a way for individuals to embrace their potential through dedication and collaboration with others around them.

It all starts by looking at information with an open mind, leaving room for interpretation rather than assuming pre-conceived ideas.

The possibilities are endless, building upon personal growth!

Misinterpreted

We've all experienced moments where we're unsure if our intentions were understood or misconstrued.

When these misunderstandings occur, it's difficult to untangle the emotions that follow and determine how best to move forward.

The way we think of others can be heavily influenced by the conversations that take place between us;

a single interaction could sway our perspective, how we speak to people in the future, and even color our future behavior.

Our thoughts are powerful yet unreliable interpreters of reality.

All too often, we rely on our assumptions to render judgment instead of requiring truth to be presented before us– an exercise that can lead one astray from the actual picture in front of them.

Poorly Translated

Our childhood experiences form most of our beliefs. Meaning they're based on a child's understanding of the world.

The problem is kids take things at face value and don't understand subtext.

For example, let's say your mom had a terrible day. You attempted to help by "organizing" while she was at work-

you're moving things around and tossing away what didn't look important to your 7-year-old eyes.

Your mom comes home and can't find the important receipt that she needed (uh-oh, you threw it away).

Then, she can't find her checkbook you "organized" in a different location.

She's not thinking clearly because something else has just shaken up her world, but she will not come home and share all of that with her 7-year-old.

So, she snaps at you, and it's super scary.

Your very literal child brain interprets that, at least partially, as "throwing things away and moving things around is bad" or "I'm terrible at organizing things."

A seed was planted that eventually grew into full-blown limiting beliefs, leading to "I can't declutter."

Unbalanced

Sometimes we interpret and translate things exactly as intended, but we absorb too much information from one source.

This makes our knowledge unbalanced. Another term for this is an echo chamber.

This is when we receive and send the same information back and forth with the same sources, making our beliefs incredibly biased.

Family units are great for support but are also a source of core beliefs.

You may have grown up having a wonderful relationship with your mom and sisters.

But your banter with each other could have reinforced beliefs that none of you are organized, you're all "hot messes", and a little chaos is fun and necessary.

And now you have a family of your own, and the house is falling apart.

You're stressed, and you don't understand why you can't seem to create these gorgeous spaces that other people have. 🤷‍♀️

Could it be those limiting beliefs around clutter that you spent years hard-wiring into your brain that makes you say, " I CAN'T declutter?"

I dive into this in my masterclass, where I share my "Holistic Clutter-Free Formula." You can watch it below for FREE!

How to overcome your limiting beliefs around clutter

So, now you understand the what and why behind your "I can't declutter" limiting beliefs.

But- you might have felt a little stressed about what you're supposed to do with that knowledge.

There are 5-steps that I've learned through the years (primarily from working through my limiting beliefs in different areas), and I will share them with you below.

You can find examples of tools you can use to work through these steps.

#1. Identify your limiting belief

This is the hard part- identifying which limiting beliefs even exist.

To be honest, most people rarely take this step unless they are already experiencing a block in achieving a goal.

In your case, it might be after the fifth attempt struggling to get the clutter out and stumbling upon this article.

(If you're looking to overcome limited beliefs in all areas, here's a great short read from a Harvard Psychologist about overcoming limiting beliefs.)

One big identifier lies in the thoughts and phrases you repeat.

For example, many people have told me the same thing: "I know what to do, and I have all the checklists, but I CAN'T get the clutter out."

If this sounds like you, definitely check out 'When you want to declutter but can't get the clutter out'.

"I know, but I can't declutter" is one of the key phrases showing a limiting belief.

Now, we will ALWAYS have some limiting beliefs in some areas.

There are tons you may never stumble upon because you never need to advance in that area. I think that's totally fine!

We will never have perfect minds, and that's okay. The point is to identify what's currently holding you back.

#2. Find the source of the belief

Once you've identified the limiting beliefs coming from the voice telling you, "I can't declutter", the next step is to identify the source of the belief.

Where did it come from?

To overcome something, we need to understand it. We need to understand that this is NOT a blame game.

Even if you feel the belief originated from someone who was clearly wrong.

Harboring blame and bitterness makes any healing process nearly impossible.

Using the next step helps to ease tension while also advancing overcoming limiting beliefs around clutter.

#3. Find the reason for the belief

Identifying the reason behind the source helps in so many ways.

First, it allows you to approach this process with empathy and compassion.

Second, it helps to infuse some truth that you might not have previously considered into the belief that has made you believe the thought, "I can't declutter."

This is especially true for those beliefs you formed in childhood. Take the example I gave earlier about the mom having a bad day-

If you could somehow collect that side of things now that you're an adult, it could help you move past that belief that was cemented all those years ago.

#4. Truth infusion

You can't just remove or delete limiting beliefs around clutter- you must replace it with something else.

The best way to truly make your subconscious accept a new belief is by constantly throwing irrefutable truth at it that contradicts the old belief.

Do some research. Find mentors who achieved what you want to achieve.

When you think you can't, find people who can. Seeing other people do it gives hope and possibility.

What works even better is to STOP saying, 'I can't declutter,' and prove that you yourself are capable.

You can do this by taking tiny actions that used to feel "impossible."

Push through the fear and discomfort to let go of just one or two items. Then, wait a day or two to let it sink into your subconscious that everything is fine.

Nothing exploded! You're not miserable from letting those things go. Meaning you can do it again.

#5. Words to cement your new reality

Your words cement your reality.

Words not only tell the world what we believe but also solidify those beliefs.

Simply changing your words, tone, and optimism can slowly change what you actually believe and how you think.

Make sure you're not saying things that bring you back down; rather, things that affirm where you want to be, even if you're not there yet.

When you change your mindset, notify your mouth! Saying the opposite of what you're trying to believe will negate the changes you’re working toward.

Don't say things that are unbelievable, like "I have a clutter-free home!" while clutter surrounds you. Trust me that won't convince your limiting beliefs around clutter to shift.

But, instead of "I can't declutter," you can now say, "I can live a clutter-free life. I can get rid of this box, and I will do it. I'm not there yet, but this is what I'm working toward."

Instead of saying, "I can't, "say something true AND in the direction that you're actually trying to grow.